My month in pictures…

September turned out to be a busy month. Between birthdays, photo shoots & kidney infections I have been kept on my toes. So, rather than bore you with all the millions of details I present a month in pictures. 

First up, let’s do the birthdays. Young & old it’s all going off in sept. My midwife bff assures me September is always the busiest month birth wise; must be down to all that seasonal goodwill. 


There were bath bombs & vegan chocolate cake. Dinners with friends & face paints with little friends. I’m doing something big for my birthday next month, so the actual day was low key, but lovely. Not featured is the birthday of my darling big bro, mostly because him & his family popped off on holiday. Not that I’m jealous. 

Now, I bet you’re all wondering what I’ve been munching this past month, well I’ll tell you. A lot of sushi, mint tea, avocados & vegan treats. There might have been few tipples in there too. Well, it was my birthday.


I’ll pause now for some lovely/amusing things I’ve snapped. 


Ok, back to definable categories. September saw my involvement in my first ever photo shoots. I was a jack of all trades whilst overseeing the shoots for my body positive project. I got through it with the help of many talented people & topped it off by posing in my pants. Who knew, right?


Style wise my nails & I were making the transition to A/W. Autumn is my favourite season, so I’m tickled to be breaking out boots & scarfs. The weather is as unpredictable as ever, so it’s impossible to determine when these cosier items may actually be needed.


One of my new weekend activities is wedding shopping with a certain someone. The pursuit of the prettiest things has had me trekking all over, but it’s all quite peachy.


Time for a selfie break.

& some random bits & pieces to finish on. 


I hope you all had a dreamy 9th month & fingers crossed you can rock October.

This week I have been mostly..

Catching up with things including my fav Friday night shows. I was delighted to see Robbie Williams on Graham Norton. As I laughed along to his stories & did some sofa dancing to his new I song I realised how much I love Robbie. Queue a day of Robbie tunes old and new (thanks Apple Music) & I have decided he is seriously underrated. Don’t believe me? Read on. 

Let’s start with his latest offering, Party like a Russian. This is prime Robbie; a little social commentary, a little humour & lot of William’s cheeky charm. The lyrics are cleverly simple, but effectively taking a pop whilst not going overboard. The music has an incorrigible beat & some sinister Russian sounding strings (it’s actually from Sergei Prokofiev’s Romeo & Juliet) going on. All in all it’s a winner. 

And now, I want to take you way back. All the way to ’97 when I was 17 & the Robster was on his 1st album. Old before I die fitted my life at the time. I was heading into my last year at school & I already had an unconditional uni place. The pressure was off & the party was on. The care free, let’s get wasted attitude of the song was my exact mood. Throw in a wee go at the Pope & this teenage ex catholic’s heart was content. 

A few years down the line & we were still in tune when Strong hit the radio waves. I was dealing with what i’ll call a turbulent relationship & trying very hard to pretend all was well. Thus, the lyrics ‘you think that I’m strong, you’re wrong’ were poignant. With this song Robbie had captured the essence of being close to the edge with his signature humour. Images of him dancing like his dad & jokes about Oprah, take the barb from the topic. Robbie always knows how to take a fairly depressing premise & make an anthem you can’t stop singing.

Now a leap to a happier place. Go gentle was written for his daughter. It’s loaded with familiar protective father material, but with some truly lovely insights thrown in. When I listen to this song I understand what he’s feeling. Go gentle through your life is good advice for any little one. It’s simple, but at the heart of what we want for our kids. Namely, to be happy & take as few bumps as possible. The lyrics are sweet & loving, but also articulate something that I have been feeling. My niece is 6yrs old, she is confident in her abilities & appearance. I never want her to lose that assurance. For me the words,

‘Baby, be a giant,

Let the world be small’.

sum up what I want to say to her. When the time is write I definitely will & then I can share some ‘old’ music with her too.

Sexed up is a song I have quite possibly misinterpreted. When I originally heard it it brought to mind the feeling of knowing your relationship is over, but not being able to fully detach. In particular, when you’re pretty much sick of the sight of each other, but keep fucking anyway. I am assured by friend that it doesn’t mean anything like that, but there you go. The point is I love this song. It’s one of the tunes I sing in a loud voice when I need to vent my frustrations. I think he has perfectly captured that feeling of needing a break up intervention. The soaring melody combined with the caustic lyrics make it a perfect turn it up & pour the wine song.

I can’t talk about Robbie without declaring my love for Rock DJ. This song does to me what he is singing about. The minute I hear the intro I want to dance. This is ultimate cocky Robbie & that’s I like him best. Never before or since I have been attracted to a skinless man ripping his flesh off. I think that says it all. 

‘Cos every inch of you is perfect….

On my way to Dublin last week something happened that not so long ago would have been a massive issue for me. The fact that it didn’t really phase me proved to me how far I’ve come. 

The incident was an airplane seat belt that didn’t fit. This is something that I actually used to fear. A while back every time I boarded a plane I braced myself for the humiliation of being too fat to fit. It turned out to be no big deal. I had a brief moment of panic, my thoughts raced through all the seat belts that had fitted & how big I was then. Then it dawned on me that I didn’t care. It didn’t matter if I was bigger or this particular seat belt was smaller. It just didn’t fit & there was an easy rememdy for that. I asked for an extender & stopped thinking about. 

Until yesterday when it dawned on me what that meant. I wasn’t embarassed to ask for the extender meaning I wasn’t ashamed to acknowledge my fat body. That is incredible. Being a part of the body positivity community has led me to a place where I can genuinely appreciate my body. Once I realised that I started thinking about all the little things that marked real progress. 

It recently occurred to me that I had gained some weight on my bum. The marvellous part was I liked it. I’ve found myself dressing to show off my bigger arse &  I am so chuffed about that. 


Then on Saturday as I was dressing I automatically tucked my top into my skirt. Not a very momentous act except that I spent years of my life ensuring that my top always covered my stomach. I was that person tugging at my clothes to ensure I was hiding flabby bits. Now I just wear what I feel nice in & here’s the kicker, I look better tucked in or in clingy vests. 


Along the same lines whilst out with my sister I asked her to take blog photos. I am usually a pain the arse about pictures. Never happy with who I look, probably because I wasn’t happy with my body. In the past I have ducked out of pictures at big events & special moments, which  I’ve come to regret. So, in recent times I have made a conscious effort to push through my discomfort & mark significant times. I was however still dissatisfied with my appearance in the photographs. This weekend was different. My sister snapped pics of me in various poses & I loved them all. Break through!

The last and probably most obvious symbol of acceptance of myself is how comfortable I am naked. I run about my house in the buff all the time. I look at myself in a full length mirror whilst I dry my hair and I do not feel critical. I have no desire to hide. I notice the parts of my body that look amazing rather than hating my stomach or chubby arms. This carries through to being naked with others. I no longer feel worried about comparisons when changing with female friends. In the same vein I confidently show my body to anyone I get jiggy with. 

This may strike a lot of people as unremarkable, but it’s a life changing shift. Immersing myself in the body positive has helped me alter how I think & feel about my body. I’ve gone from yo yo dieting, disordered eating & choosing clothes to specfically hide ‘problem’ areas to being a woman who no longer believes there are any bad body parts. I like me. I like my curves, my wobbly bits & everything else. Body positivity works. Women supporting & encouraging each other moves mountains. So, I owe a big thank you to all of you who read, comment & create fat friendly content. High five, ladies, we’re changing the world. 

This week I have been mostly…

admiring my hair. Yup, that’s right, I’ve been loving myself again. I’m a proud ginger & this week I have been enjoying some tunes that celebrate my flame haired sisters. 

  
I’m obviously not a big fan of stereotypes, but in the case of my hair colour, most of them fit. I am your classic cliche of a redhead and I love it. 

I came to Bruce Springsteen late. I was too young & in any case my tastes diverged from his most famous stuff. The Ghost of Tom Joad was his first work that caught my attention. From there I listened to random pieces & found myself agreeing with some of his politics. In short, Bruce grew on me, but he didn’t win my heart until I heard Redheaded Woman. I love the down & dirty lyrics. His theory that red heads are more sexually charged is actually backed by science. It’s a rollicking tune and Bruce’s delivery is so believable. I can personally attest to the fact that redheads get the job (dirty or otherwise) done & I’m certainSpringsteen can too. 

For my next pick I’m going all hipster & demanding you listen to the original.  Valerie by The Zutons was an immediate favourite for me. I actually adored their entire debut album. My affection for this song has grown as numerous people have told me that it reminds them of me. I think the lyrics 

‘I miss your ginger hair & the way you like to dress’

are the culprits. I am well known for my sometimes unusual style. It pleases me that friends appreciate both my weird clothes & my ginger mane. I know Amy WInehouse’s version has become the standard of this song, but I’ll always love The Zutons best. 

Neil Young’s Cinnamon Girl is probably the original manic pixie dream girl, but without the negative connotations. He claims to have just seen a girl in the street, adored how she looked & wrote this gorgeous fantasy. The lyrics don’t specifically say that she has red hair, but I like to think that cinnamon refers to her spicy locks. I’ve always been a hippie chick, so Neil Young is so up my street. I’m a complete sucker for this hazy, lazy trip of a song. Wouldn’t it be perfect to inspire a dream like this. 

Caroline England is new to me. I stumbled upon Ginger & knew I was going to like this artist. The song is another celebration of scarlett ladies, but this one has edge. England hints at some of the crap gingers sometimes have to put up with. However, she doesn’t wallow, her message is I’m awesome & you can suck it. Which, I can relate to. The unusual texture in her voice adds a unique sound to the track. It’s an instant classic.