Have you ever wondered what happens in my head before I filter it onto the paper/screen? I have just the thing for you.
For the bargain price of £1 a month you can access my new membership level on Ko-Fi. I’ll be posting works in progress, previously unpublished pieces & some poetry (I still write it, but rarely pursue publication). If this sounds up your street, head over to Ko-Fi. If not, please continue to enjoy my freely available content around the web.
Poetry was my first writing love. As I’ve grown old & weary my poetic juices have dried up a little. The mood does still occasionally strike. Sometimes only poetry offers the chance to sweep my feelings out.
It’s not necessarily impressive, but it is completely effective. Reading it writing; words are a beautiful thing.
If you enjoy my writing you can support me on Ko-Fi
The universe obviously thought my life was going a little to smoothly, so she threw me a little kidney shaped drama.
I woke in the night with excruciating upper abdominal & chest pain. Violent throwing up followed by passing out left me a tad perturbed. It was actually a little scary as the chest symptoms mirrored all the things you read in heart attack warnings. More passing out & worsening pain led to a call to NHS 24 who swiftly sent an ambulance.
The paramedics did a heart trace & found me to be more tachycardic than just pain could account for. To be honest I think the culprit for my racing heart was sheer panic at finding myself in a bloody ambulance. Anyway, an empty a&e and some very nice medical folk soon led to a diagnosis; an inflamed kidney.
At the just kill me stage.
I had yet another kidney infection, which had caused my kidney to become in inflamed with sheer indignation. I can’t really blame my poor kidney. The number of kidney & urinary tract infections I’ve had in the past 12mths is ridiculous. I was admitted to surgical ward, given fluids, morphine & monitored.
It looks like I might have tiny kidney stones. These little bastards are causing all the trouble. I need to have a detailed scan later this week. If there are stones lurking they can be broken up with ultra sound waves. Which, overall is good outcome. I am always delighted when drs can give me answers.
Progressed to I can stand the pain, but I hate hospital stage.
For the time being I am glad to be home & reallly hoping this will spell an end to all the kidney issues. Another hospital stay & resultant recovery time has put a serious dent in my productivity. So, I am currently stressing about the enormous backlog of tasks I have. I’m behind in everything from housework to writing, personal grooming to fundraising. Spoonie life is anxiety ridden.
Oh, serious brownie points to the toy boy for taking excellent care of me. Big tick in all the boyfriend nursing boxes. He brought me jelly, fed my cat, fetched me fresh knickers & listened to hours of my morphine addaled chatter. He even got me a cute get well card. Thanks, babe.
I’ve not been the busiest of bees. I’ve had some minor illnesses dragging on & that has slowed me down. Thus my outfits are slouchy & my snap shots somewhat indolent.
I’ve caught my city looking pretty in the sun & also the pouring rain that soaked right through to my knickers. There has been a lot of resting with Bronan. Plus plenty of time wasting selfies.
I visited mum & her beautiful poodles, indulged in comfort food & noticed some lovely details on familiar buildings whilst the toy boy bored me with football.
There has been nail painting, anti biotic gobbling & languorous layering of clothes.
I was awoken by the toy boy’s kitten grooming me with her very tough tongue. Luxuriated in Joan Didion’s words & expressed some opinions via my badge collection.
And just like that I give you the life of a procastinating freelance spoonie.
I was inspired by my darling sister’s 35 before 35 post to get some goals down in black & white. However, as I’m only 3 months from the mid 30’s point I had to raise the age bar. So, here it is, the 40 things I really must get done before I enter middle age.
1 Finish my tattoo collection. I have three more designs that need to get out of my head & onto my body.
2 Develop my stigma fighting business plan.
3 Have babies.
4 Take a ride in a hot air balloon.
5 Learn to drive. Yes, I am a 34yr old woman who is terrified of driving.
6 Buy all the Irregular Choice shoes.
7 Rescue animals from factory farming.
8 Perform in a burlesque show. Chorus line would cool.
9 Visit Jenna in Philadelphia.
10 Master Japenese cooking. I need to know I can have yasai gyoza whenever I feel the urge.
11 Visit Tagalooma with Athena.
12 Adopt a retired greyhound.
13 Lots & lots of surface piercings.
14 Execute the cutest pregnancy announcement ever.
15 Cook Xmas dinner for my entire family.
16 Take a break in one of those beach huts on stilts in the ocean.
17 Write for Skorch.
18 Mix my own perfume.
19 Teach Billy to swim properly.
20 Get a book deal.
21 Check out those big heads on Easter Island.
22 Send the perfect family xmas cards.
23 Make Danilo go on the big romantic xmas wheel.
25 Perfect one ballroom dance & trot it out at every single occasion.
26 Take a romantic break in a Scottish castle.
27 Learn Sign language.
28 Fall utterly in love with more nieces & nephews. Get to it, siblings!
29 Get a professional portrait painted of my beautiful Bronan.
30 Rock the Big Apple with my girls.
31 Find miraculous cure for all my health issues.
32 Take my little ones to Disney World.
33 See Morrissey live.
34 Finish Athena’s books before she gets too old for them.
35 Try synchronised swimming.
36 Finally see Much Ado About Nothing performed at Bard in the Botanics.
37 Send random mystery flowers to folk who would appreciate them.
38 Learn to code (at least well enough to snazz my blog).
39 Take my Mum to Austria to do the Sound of Music tour.
40 Be the best Mummy ever!
Any advice or suggestions on who to achieve my goals is most welcome. Wish my luck.
Something in the way she moves... 
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