Lifestyle

Upgrade Yourself

~ somethinginthewayshemoves ~ 5 Comments

Recently, something has been getting on my wick. It started a few weeks ago when I overheard some boys talking on a bus. They were discussing their weekend exploits & one boy said that he’d pulled a certain girl. One of his mates said ‘ but, she’s fat’ to which the original lad replied that fat girls let you do anything. Much laughter ensued. Those pathetic fat girls are just so funny. Succumbing to any sexual pressure because no one else might ever want them ha ha ha

Ever since then I’ve been noticing the fat jokes more. Comedians, films, Facebook, they’re everywhere. All basically saying the same thing; fat women are not sexy. People only sleep with us because they’re desperate or for a bet or because we’ll be so incredibly grateful we will forget how to say no.

FUCK THAT

I am sexy. Men (& women) desire me. I am chatted up rather a lot actually. I have dated extensively. Some of the folk I’ve been with were seriously hot and shock horror, they thought I was hot too. 

  

My sex life is fantastic. I have all the agency & choice of my thinner sisters. I have never felt thankful that someone deigned to fuck me. I would have nothing to do with a person who entertained such notions. 

I am smart, passionate,weird & smoking hot. People are attracted to me for all those reasons. I’m a whole person with lots to offer & so are you. I want fat girls to know that your romantic/sexual life will be no different from anyone else’s. Do not let popular culture’s representation of fat get under your skin. You will meet arseholes & sweethearts. They will come on all shapes & sizes. You will have amazing sex & really quite bad sex. People will love you. People will find you utterly beautiful. 

You do not have settle. Do not put up with anyone who makes you feel less than. You deserve love, passion, companionship & fun. Believe me, you will get it. 

Now, take a deep breath & get out there. 

  

If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.

Good day sunshine…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves ~ 4 Comments

Happy Easter! It seems that zombie jesus ressurected the sun, for which I am truly thankful. Winter seems to have been upon us forever & finally taking a walk in the sun was glorious. 

As usual we visited Mum. Shared some chocolate & chatter, then proceeded to take the dogs to the park. I adore all of my canine family, but sometimes when they get together, they are maniacs. Yesterday was one of those days. My sister’s boy Seb is desperately in love with Mum’s oldest, Coco. He absolutely had to be by her side at every moment (I’ll skim over the humping). As cute as this is it makes walking them on the leads a little tricky. Once we reached the park all was well. All three pups got to run free whilst we humans had a wee rest. If you’ve never seen a poodle in full run, believe me it is a sight to behold. They leap with such grace. In D’artangnan’s case the contrast between this poise & his usual daft self is adorable. 

  

I put together a really cute, casual outfit and was pleased with my look. However, by the time I had done battle  with a horny lab & the dogs had found every spot of mud in the vicinity I was looking a little less put together. So, here is my dishevelled self. I mind not because those doggies give me so much joy. 

  

Dress – Junarose

Flatforms – Primark

Headband – Ebay

Neither my Mother nor my sister was a fan of my floral ears. Judging by the looks of passersby, I suspect they were dubious too. I on the other hand adore them and let’s face it, only my opinion matters! I teemed them with these cute little side buns; my hair game was good. Worn with a t shirt dress & flatforms it added up to a great Easter park outfit. 

 

 

 

When we want these babies to pose for a photo they have none of it, but of the course the minute we try to take some without them, they insist on getting involved. Gorgeous, but naughty pups. 

  

The photo credits go to my sister, Lauren (as always), but she gets extra points for these beautiful pictures of the fur babies. You can check out her take on our day ( & probably more stunning pics) over at  Living in a box.

I hope you all had a happy Easter however you celebrate it. 

My week in pictures.

~ somethinginthewayshemoves ~ 2 Comments

The past has week has been busy, but fun. I have been writing up a storm, hosting a birthday party for a friend, baking, puppy sitting, Facetiming my girl, painting my nails  & joining the #bootyrevolution.

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

I have a body positive piece in The Swag Guide, I’d love it if you took a look. The Swag Guide is a scottish blogger magazine & it is fantastic. 

Mamma Mia….

~ somethinginthewayshemoves ~ 2 Comments

With Mother’s Day fast approaching I wanted to take a little time to honour the amazing woman who is my Mum. 

With parents usually being our biggest early influences an awesome mother goes a long way in creating an awesome woman. I am lucky enough to have just such motherly figure. From the very beginning she taught me that I had strength, power & choice. Leading by example my Mum raised four children before returning to work & forging a successful career. In doing so she proved  that women need not be just one thing. All choices are valid & none are final. 

My Mum takes control, she speaks her mind & she owns her opinions. Growing up with a woman like this allowed me not to be cowed. The fact that I could always rely on her support & acceptance allowed me to grow into the person I am. She instilled the confidence in me to not only be who I want to be, but to be vocal & unashamed about it. I doubt my Mum would describe herself as a feminist, but she certainly helped forge the radical feminist I have become. 

Basically, my Mum is amazing. She is glamorous, independent, funny, loyal & supportive. Above all, she is always there. I can rely on her to be there for my disasters & triumphs. I know she will always be fighting in my corner. 



I love you, Mum. Thank you. 

If your Mum is also one in a million, don’t forget to spoil her this Mother’s Day. Why not enter Parkdean’s Mother’s Day competition & win a relaxing break for your fabulous Mum. 

My week in pictures…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

It has been a week of highs & lows. There has been too much pain & too little sleep. Thankfully I have also been involved in some joy inducing activities. Overall I’m declaring it a win.

A financial boost allowed a wee spending spree. I got a few bits for myself & many bits of my muffin. She will be visiting with my big bro from Australia in April & I am getting very excited. I love Facetiming with my girl, but nothing compares to the wonder of wrapping my arms around her little body & squeezing her tight. I found her a My Little Pony dress that she will freak over & some super cute Comic Relief t-shirts.

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Treats for myself included some budget beauty, freebies from
a plus size event & my very first pair of flatforms. As usual I’m sharing some random snaps of sights I enjoyed; Glasgow & Edinburgh both had some little treasures for me. Talking of the capital, whilst through there for the aforementioned event I was lucky enough to visit my favourite bar with my favourite man. This week even included some flowers, in my opinion white roses stomp all over red in the romance stakes.

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I’ll leave you with my most momentous addition. On Wednesday I finally got my new tattoo. I went to True Colour Tattoo where I was inked by the fabulous Sharon. It was so good to finally be tattooed by a woman, the fact that she is an old school friend made it even better. I am ecstatic with my tattoo & I can not recommend True Colour enough. I can honestly say this was my favourite tattoo experience. I will definitely be going back.

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My funny valentine…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves ~ 2 Comments

Forever a romantic, I am a valentine’s fan. As much as I love the mushy stuff the chances of my soppy side being indulged are slim. Nevertheless I have come up with a lovey dovey wish list just in case a certain someone is paying attention.

I’m more into quirky, thoughtful gifts than grand gestures or your standard valentine’s day fair. With that in mind I picked out a handful of items I’d love to receive & a spattering of things I’d choose to give.

Putting a twist on the traditional are these his & hers floral offerings. White flowers are guaranteed to have me swooning, so white roses seem appropriate. Orchids strike me as both sexy & romantic. This black variety hits a chord with me.

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If like me you’re looking for something a little different, but still sweet. These picks might float your boat.

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Matchstick Biscuits – Eat My Cake London £10
Message Beanstalk Seeds – BEEcycle ltd £3

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Personalised Soundwave Voice Art – Frenzy House on Etsy £19.

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Love Letters of Great Men & Women by Ursula Doyle – Waterstones £7.19
Tom Ford – House of Frasers £92
Raspberry Pi 2 – The Pi Hut £32
Irregular Choice – Schuh £80

What good would Feb 14th be if we didn’t get a bit dirty? Beautiful lingerie never fails to get me in the mood.

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Stockings – M&S £8
Lace Shelf Baby Doll & Thong – Oh La La Cherie (Curves)

I’ve already picked up my valentine’s card. It may give you a clue as to what keeps me smiling.

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Scribbler £2.65

Whatever your status & however you celebrate, I hope you have a wonderful day.

My week in pictures….

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

Excuse my absence, last week was packed with ALL the things. I headed to edinburgh on Tuesday to deliver some presentations. These were critical, possibly game changing lectures & I don’t mind admitting my stress levels wee soaring. After a tough first session the reception warmed up & I was a hit.

I had to present over three days, which necessitated finding somewhere to stay. Luckily I found an amazing rental flat on rose st. The location was perfect & the flat itself was lovely. Highlight was absolutely the massive shower, so good for unwinding after a hard day’s work.

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All work & no fun does, as they say make for a dull ly. With that in mind I took advantage of being in my favourite man’s city. We had a glass bottle or two of wine & delighted in each others company. I also managed to squeeze in catch up with my friend & kindred spirit, Aidan.
It was a highly successful trip.

As always, edinburgh was looking spiffing. I snapped a few of shots of vistas that took my fancy.

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The rest of the week was taken up with my fur babies. I nipped through to Mum’s to look after my poodle family. Coco & her son D’artagnan are gorgeous if a little hyper, but were little darlings for me.

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On Saturday I was wowed by the most amazing sunset. I really do love these vibrant natural displays. There was more wow on Sunday when I was reunited with my beautiful Bronan.

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I’ll conclude with some random pictures of things that pleased through out the week.

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* apartment – http://www.destinyscotland.com

Walking in a winter wonderland…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

Yesterday was the kind of day I love. It was cold, but dry & the sun was shining bright. The perfect day for a wee winter wander with my best friend. At the end of our walk lay the fantastic Kelvingrove Art Gallery & Museum, which happens to be one of favourite places. We went in to check out the Alasdair Grey exhibit, which is excellent, go see it!

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Obviously with snow on the ground I needed to wrap up warm & some lingering pain made comfort a priority. I also wanted to look rather nice & happily, I think I accomplished all three.

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Faux fur coat – Primark
Scarf – Macy’s

This amazing faux fur (picked up
for a snip in the sales) teemed with my giant scarf & cost arm warmers protected me from the icy weather. A simple black top & leggings had ease covered. Which left the perking up to this beautiful floral print duster coat. All three components did their job perfectly. I felt splendid.

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Leggings – M&S
Top – Oasis
Duster – New Look

Our walk was so pretty that I can’t resist sharing a few snaps. If you’re local, Kelvingrove park is worth braving the cold for.

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Spoonies explained..

~ somethinginthewayshemoves ~ 2 Comments

I used a term in a post last week that garnered some questions. Spoon theory is a model I am incredibly familiar with, but I forget that not everyone is. So, I thought I’d give the theory & it’s origins.

The term was originally coined by Christine Miserandino in response to a friend’s question about what having lupus feels like. Miserandino explained that the conversation took place at dinner & she used what she had to hand in her metaphor. Hence, spoons became her unit of measurement. She asked her friend to consider that each daily activity (including the very basic, washing, dressing, eating) required a certain number of spoons (energy)to complete. Whilst a healthy person will usually have unlimited spoons, a person dealing with chronic illness or disability will have varying quantities of ‘spoons’ each day. As a result a chronically ill person must carefully calculate a day’s activities in advance in order to avoid running out of spoons before the end of the day. When a person has used all their spoons they are no longer capable of much more than resting. So, in effect, life with a chronic illness becomes a constant balancing act of tasks the must be done against spoons available to do them.

There you have it, an introduction to spoon theory. I am aware it’s not a particularly cheery topic, as a sweetner I offer you some cute pictures of my darling boy, Bronan.

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If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.

A little something to make me sweeter….

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

I had a bit of a rest last week. I had been very busy the preceding weeks & my poor wonky body was feeling the strain. As a result I didn’t get the chance to take any OOTD pictures. I did however procure a number of treats designed to make me feel lovely. 

There is no better treat than a free treat, so I shall start off with my first freebie (courtesy of a dreaded glossy mag). Balance Me Super Moisturising body wash is exactly what I need at the moment. I have been slathering on copious amounts & my skin is feeling better. 

My next pick me up was a fabulous bargain. I am very fond of big, shiny faux engagement rings. I found this sparkling ‘ruby’ on eBay & had to have it. 

I was lucky enough to receive a 2nd freebie last week. This time some smart glasses from SpecSavers. If you get your contacts from them & sign up to a direct debit they offer you a free pair of specs. It’s a great deal. I picked these round tortoiseshell frames. They are actually from the men’s section, but I love them. I wanted something completely different to my usual style & these fit the bill perfectly. 

My final little delight was actually a Christmas gift. My lovely almost brother in law surprised me with his present buying talents when I opened this Molton Brown candle. I had lit it before, but really appreciated it’s calming scent over the last few days. It’s called Imp’s Whisper, which is a name that pleases me. With hints of lavender, tobacco & vetyver grass it is the perfect soothing scent.