All by myself…

I’m an ‘independent woman’. I’ve lived alone for basically my whole adult life. I take care of myself (I pay folk to do the manual labour, but still). I enjoy my own company. I can usually get by without too much hand holding.

I have, however, recently become aware of an infuriating blip in my self sufficiency. Since becoming single again I have noticed that I can’t go to the cinema alone. It wouldn’t be a big deal, except for the fact that I love seeing films on the big screen. I used to go weekly with my sister, but the advent of her baba has ruled that out. Almost all of my friends also have little ones. The few that don’t, live in different cities. Obviously, I no longer have a boyfriend to view blockbusters with & the cinema isn’t really a good date place. Which leaves me with, go alone (until I line up a cinema buddy) or don’t go at all. Neither of which felt appealing.

With each passing film that I had really wanted to see I have grown more frustrated with myself. Why can’t I go to cinema alone? I can’t think of much else that I wouldn’t do alone. I’ve travelled solo and eating out by myself doesn’t bother me. I have no problem sitting in bar or cafe, whiling a away an hour or two in my own company. I love living alone, to be honest I think it’s my preference. I attend scary medical appointments and pursue a variety of opportunities alone. Sitting in a darkened room staring at a screen unaccompanied shouldn’t be an issue. I can handle big grown up things without a partner. Why can’t I tackle something so trivial?

The only thing I could come up with is some weird insecurity about being judged. Would people think I don’t have any friends? Are strangers going to think I’m a loser? The obvious answer to these questions is who cares! I’ve never given much credence to the opinions of randoms. I’m not sure why I would start now. Yet, the anxiety persisted. There are of course lots of things that I felt worried about doing alone. Loads of occasions when I required back up or missed an event because I couldn’t face a crowd without a buffer. Whilst, not ideal, I can accept that as part of life with mental health difficulties. I couldn’t, though, make myself ok with just giving up a thing I regularly enjoy.

So, to utilise a cliche, I faced my fears. Full disclosure, I made it really easy. I picked a 10.30am screening when the cinema is practically empty. I also booked my ticket online. Thus minimising the amount of actual person to person contact I had to engage in. I did have all those negative thoughts running through my head. I did it anyway.

I can’t say that I was aware of anyone paying attention to my solo status. Note to everyone, hardly anyone cares about what the people around them look like, wear, are doing & so on. For the most part we’re all too busy dealing with the nonsense that’s going on in our own lives/days/heads. In short, if at all possible, do the thing. Don’t give yourself a hard time if you can’t manage every thing, but at least attempt anything close to manageable. It feels really bloody good to meet even little challenges.

My first me, myself & I movie was Long Shot. It’s not a classic rom com, but it is cute. I find Rogen’s charming outcast bit pretty attractive & there were enough feels to keep me interested. Definitely not a bad way to spend a Monday morning. Oh & I won’t have to see a superhero movie next time. Single life is actually pretty good.

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Lazy week in pictures…

I’ve been taking is rather easy during this most confusing period of the year. I say confusing because I cannot keep track of what day it is or even what time day it might be. All the usual markers are skewiff.

No one is at work when you expect them to be. Regular tv scheduling has been abandoned & I haven’t cooked an actual meal in days. I mainly been soaking in hot baths, watching old movies and reading whilst curled in a cosy ball. On the few occasions that I have removed my pyjamas it has been to ogle a bigger screen and cuddle some cuties.

On Boxing Day I saw Mary Poppins with my sis & her boy. I absolutely adored the original Poppins and was skeptical about her return. I was relieved to discover it wasn’t a remake, but one of the other Poppins stories. Also, further comforted when I learned they’d used older style animation & that an old fav was making an appearance. The film is utterly enchanting. It keeps to spirit of the original and is beautifully done. Dick Van Dyke is a highlight, but the whole thing delighted me. The baba was impressed too. He as been to the cinema before, but I think this is first time he was really watching. His little face was a picture of astounded mirth. The entire experience was, as the lady herself would say, practically perfect in every way.

Cinema foot selfie

#projectpostit

This evening I saw Aquaman with the Toyboy. The TB & I take turns to pick the film; tonight was of course his choice. He likes nothing more than a superhero caper. I on the other hand, find there are entirely too many comic book crusades on the go these days. The underwater worlds in Aquaman are very beautiful. Otherwise it’s a standard good vs evil, handsome hunk saves the day type of affair. In keeping with my current air of laziness I wore the same outfit for both cinema trips. Slight accessory reworking and I was good to go.

ly h Kerr

ly h Kerr

Dress – Boohoo

Cardi – M&S

Earrings – Gift

Red tree

As the year draws to a close I am

grateful for these days to laze around & enjoy my loved ones. 2018 has been a slog. On the world scale it’s been bleak. On personal level there’s been a bunch of grey with some startlingly bright spots. I have reason to believe that 2019 could be a bloody good one for me. I hope the same applies to everyone reading (& the global scene pulls its socks up too). I wish you all a happy & hopeful New Year. Brace yourself, we’re about to start all over again.

Another cruelty free quickie…

It’s Friday and after a rough week I’m ending on a high. I got some unexpected, but very good news yesterday. Now I am sailing into the weekend relaxed & very ready to have some fun. I have a mini break planned, bunch of new clothes to show off & a tiny little nephew to smother in kisses. Before we get to all that, I have a cruelty free quickie for you.

I love being a ginger. I’ve always loved being a redhead. Sadly, the older I get, the lighter my hair becomes. To the point that people have started calling me strawberry blonde. That may not seem like a big deal, but it breaks my heart. Ginger nut is part of my identity! I’m too low maintenance to keep up with dying my hair, but the thought of losing my burnished tones altogether is just awful. Enter, Infuse My Colour, my salvation. It’s a colour infused shampoo that stops the fade in coloured & enhances the tones in natural hair. I bought copper in the hope that it would revitalise my natural colour. I was not disappointed. I’ve only been using the shampoo for 7 days and have already noticed a big difference.

ly h Kerr

Infuse my colour

I’m impressed at how quickly I have seen results & will definitely continue using the shampoo. Infuse My Colour is of course vegan & cruelty free. In case you were curious, here I am in my younger days as a proper, hardcore ginger.

Today I have a bonus quickie, lucky you. One of birthday gifts from my darling sis was some Kiko Milano products. I tried out the eyeshadow duo yesterday & it was a hit. It’s super soft & glides right on. Excellent pigmentation, even better staying power. I saw A Star is Born last night & wept like a baby; the eyeshadow stayed put. I love it.

ly h Kerr

Kiko Milano bright duo

A Star is Born incidentally is excellent. A beautiful interruption of a wonderful film. Bradley Cooper & Lady Gaga blew me away, both displaying talents I didn’t know they had. Word of warning though, all those people saying it isn’t as sad as the Streisand version are LYING. Prepare to be destroyed.

You got me working night & day…

This week’s featured #ootd inspired by the lovely Becky Barnes. She relaunched her #fatpinspiration series on instagram. Basically she posts outfit inspiration from Pinterest & then lots of lovely fat folk post their take on the look.

I loved the idea the minute I saw it & luckily had the perfect outfit. I styled up a cute strappy summer dress with my lovely stuff denim shirt. On Saturday mornings I do some family stuff & spend time with my biggest nephew. Turns out this outfit was ideal for chasing our shadows and making our breakfast into dinosaurs.

Pinspiration

ly h Kerr

Saturday evening held more adult pursuits in the form of date night. After a hectic week at the festival (last instalment of fringe posts coming soon) we opted for a chilled night at the cinema. I decided to take my outfit from day to night with a few switch ups. I wore my dress over my shirt, pinafore style. Added some big jangly earrings, a cute clutch & my faux leather jacket. I really liked the outcome.

ly h Kerr

Vegan clutch

Jacket – Simply Be

Dress – Forever21

Shirt – New Look

Clutch – Gift

It was my turn to pick the film & I choose Equalizer 2. I only recently discovered they’d made a film of this and watched the first one the other week. I loved it & was excited for the sequel. I used to watch the old tv series sometimes if my Mum let me stay up late, so I’m fond of the character. It didn’t disappoint. It’s exactly the kind of action movie I like. Proper goodies & baddies, you have to think a bit & it’s bloody without being too brutal. You’ll probably work out the wee twists, but you won’t mind. I love Denzel in this role.

Clutch & cinema ticketsCinema selfie ly h Kerr

Diamonds & rust…

On Tuesday I took a little trip over to Glasgow’s best thrift store. As usual they had treasures galore. I came away with some excellent finds both old & brand new.

The first 2nd hand piece I picked out was this gorgeous rust coloured metallic skirt. Autumnal tones are my favourite & the weather does seem to be on the turn. Perfect time to don a shimmery earth tone. I’m sure I’ll get around to wearing this one as intended, but yesterday I needed something strapless to pair with a skater skirt. I couldn’t find any of my black tube tops, so I repurposed my new skirt. I rather liked the look. Unfortunately the top looked a little more sheer when photographed than it did in person. You’ll just have to take my word that you couldn’t see my whole bra in real life.

ly h Kerr

Velvet skirt – Forever21

Skirt as top – Glad Rags

Shrug – Primark

I also treated myself to this beauty from ThingsbyRosana. Glad Rags showcase a selection of local designers for limited periods. All of whom make beautiful things. I’ve actually hankered after one of her brooches since I spotted them on Instagram. I was incredibly pleased to get my hands on this new set of boobs.

THINGSByROSANA Boob Brooch

I matched my eye make up to my outfit with coppery shades & was all set for date night at the cinema.It was the Toyboy’s turn to pick, so we saw Ant Man & The Wasp. He loved it, I was there for ice blast & reclining chair. Paul Rudd is cute & funny, the usual super hero capers ensue with added shrinking of almost everything. If you’re a Marvel fan I expect you’ll enjoy it as much as the TB did. Otherwise, I wouldn’t rush to see it.

ly h Kerr ice blast

I feel pretty…

On Friday night I met the Toyboy for a super quick dinner & a terrible movie. I say dinner, I only ended up with sweet potato fries. Plus the film starred Amy Schumer. If I’m honest, it was a poor attempt at Friday nighting. I did manage to get some outfit photos, so all was was not not lost.

It does have to be said, it was good outfit & we did rectify things by watching a bloody good film (anon) when we got home. I picked this retro beauty up on Thursday & could not wait get it on my body. I love that it had a 50’s feel, is my favourite colour & has rare, but beloved pockets. Really big ones, too!

ly h Kerr

Dress – Primark

Cardi – Monsoon

Harness Bra – Pour Moi

I think the harness bra sexes it up just enough for a night time excursion. I also went big on accessories, overall, I felt banging.

Cinema selfie

The film we saw was of course, I Feel Pretty. It is awful as the reviews claimed. Its feminism & body positivity are flawed in all the ways you’ve been reading about. It is also just a bad film. So stupid in places that I actually felt insulted. It is filled with nonsense, dated sexist tropes & a terrible imagining of what could have been (in other hands) an interesting concept. Also, Amy Schumer is trash. Give it a miss.

Ticket stub, nail art, red dress