fat and happy

That summer feeling…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

The summer holidays are drawing to close in Scotland. Thus, the last few weeks have been filled with nibling adventures. It’s been tricky balancing ebullient days with enough rest, which has caused a few problems. All entirely worth it.

In the biggest and most exciting news, I have a new nibling. My sister had another boy a few weeks ago and he is of course, perfect. Everyone is doing great & my big boy is absolutely loving being a brother. I had my first adventure out with the tiny little man last week. My sis & I plus both boys checked out Beyond Van Gogh. It’s an immersive art exhibit and we loved it. The little man was captivated by all the colour and light. Big boy fascinated by the whole ear thing. I did really enjoy the experience, but I would have liked some smaller rooms for a more immersive feel. I think it would have felt more like stepping into the art in smaller spaces.

I felt like wearing something exuberant to delve into Van Gogh. I plumped for a retro vibe, with this floral dress and petticoat. I always feel very femme & pretty in this shape.

Dress & Petticoat – Lindy Bop

Summer wouldn’t be complete without a trip to the Glasgow Science Centre (GSC). The kids love being able touch and investigate everything. The twins especially enjoyed a big safe space that they can have free run of. Their big sister really took to the floor that explores the human body. Her sprint time & jump height were extraordinary. The naked body & skeletons also garnered some attention. I met my manager from when I worked at the science centre and was surprised to discover he remembered me. In fact colleagues had recently been talking me. Considering it’s been twenty years, I’m a little concerned about what made me stick in their heads. Past idiosyncrasies aside, we had a fabulous day. Special shout out to gift shop, which bucks the trend of insanely expensive price tags. They have a great range of fun & affordable treats.

GSC is always insanely hot. I suppose that’s bound to happen in building made from concrete and glass. To mitigate this I went for my new little vesty dress. Ten out of ten, so comfortable and light. It is definitely going to be a staple.

Dress – Nobody’s Child. Kimono – Simply Be

On the less fun side the heat has been playing havoc with my Pots. There has been so much dizziness and a few fainting disasters. Air hunger has also been a huge problem. I have upped my water intake, doing electrolyte drinks, lots of sitting down, breathing excerises, fans & so on. All to now avail. I’m really hoping symptoms might diminish as the temperature cools. The new problem is Cubital Tunnel Syndrome. It’s caused by compression of a nerve in the elbow and results in numbness, pain and weakness in the hand. My right pinky & ring finger started getting pins & needles a few months ago and it never went away. Half of my hand is now constantly numb and the remaining half is very weak. I don’t have a lot of pain, but not having full use of my dominant hand is a significant challenge. I’ve had my elbow x rayed & it has mild degenerative changes, which may be the source of the problem. Again I’m doing everything I can and so far no improvement. I have excercises, wear a splint at night, changed my arm position when typing. I’m waiting to see physio. This condition can be reversed, but it frustrating to be stuck with another limitation in the mean time. Fingers crossed that physio helps. Spoonie life is kicking my arse.

If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.

Walking on sunshine…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

It finally happened, the sun has arrived. We had two whole proper hot sunny days. It did rain yesterday, but that’s Glasgow for you. Anyway, my point is, summer is coming.

With it will come a deluge of diet talk, body shaming and unsolicited opinions. That means it’s time for my annual reminder; we all have a summer body. Everyone deserves to feel the sun on their skin and enjoy the summer. There will be many external voices proclaiming the need to change or hide your body. I implore you to ignore them.

I know it can feel scary to let the world see something you have been taught to believe is bad. I also know that when you release yourself from the fear of judgement it feels goooood. Nothing terrible happens if you go to the park in a sundress with your bingo wings flying free. The truth is most people aren’t paying you that much attention. We’re all busy living our lives. We’re chatting or day dreaming or stressing or thinking about what we need from Tesco. No one is focused on your body or outfit even a fraction as much as you are.

The fuckwits who will stare or comment on a photo are in the minority. Those are not your people. Those are mean, small minded probably deeply insecure folk. Do not give them power over you or your choices. Especially when there is so much at stake.

It’s hard for me to articulate just how much happier I am since embraced the body I’m in. The freedom not just to wear whatever I feel good in, but also to enjoy what I do in those clothes has touched every aspect of my life. There were so many things that I just wouldn’t do. Activities that I love, like swimming or spa days were frought with anxiety. My career was hugely impacted by all the opportunities I didn’t think I could I take. Purely because I didn’t look the way I thought smart, successful people should look. A hot summer was just extended discomfort. Constantly trying to balance not being too hot, with not being too visible. Covering scars, flabby bits, dodging photos, worrying that I’ll embarrass people I care about. I missed so much big and small, pushing things off for a time when I’d weigh less.

Oh how I wish someone could have enlightened years earlier. I’m still fat. I’m still covered in scars. I’m peely wally, stretch marked, my boobs sag. And I’m living life more fully than I ever thought possible. My size and appearance no longer feature in my decisions. No one who matters in my life cares about the number on a scale.

I’m not denying that fat phobia exists. Nor am I saying no one will ever judge you or be unkind. What I am saying is that the joy you gain from being fully present in all of your endeavours far out weighs all that bullshit. Plus, there is no cardigan or floaty top that magically conceals one’s size. Feeling worthy of respect and happiness was my first step in being able to fight for it.

Please let me cut through all the negativity. Wear the shorts. Go to pool. Put on your sexiest outfit and strut your stuff. Our visibility allows other people to step into the light. Trust me, it is lovely out here.

If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.

Life is a rollercoaster…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

It’s been a mixed few weeks. The Easter holidays presented lots of opportunities for auntie time. Unfortunately, my body has seized every opportunity to mess with me.

My first Easter adventure was a trip to The Burrell Collection. I spent a lot of time here as a kid and always enjoyed it. It is so nice to share it with the next generation. The boy absolutely loved all the swords and armour. I loved watching him explore.

Dress – Forever 21 Tights – Snag Boots – Air Cloudies

The Burrell is really good on the accessibility front. Wide flat spaces that are easy to manoeuvre. Plenty of places to sit throughout, plus light weight stools you can carry around with you. Spacious lifts to all floors. It is a stunning buildings, with exhibits to entertain all ages.

As you know, I’m big into my glasses. I can never have enough. Thus, I was delighted to collab with Firmoo. These blue beauties have been on my face since the moment they arrived.

Glasses – Firmoo *

Next up was a little dip with my bestie & her brood. Swimming is my favourite, not least because I can properly carry on with kids. In the water I can move with ease. It feels so good not to be in pain every second. It’s even better to play a shark, spin the kids, help them ‘swim’. Much fun was had even if my littlest niece was frustrated that she needed to hold on to me. She was determined that she could do it herself and was not convinced when I explained that she couldn’t swim. Swimming with littles requires clothes that can be easily pulled on whilst squeezed into a tiny changing room with a wiggly child. These wide legs were perfect.

Trousers – Pockets and Sedition Cardigan – Monsoon

A few days later I was back with the treesome for the twin’s birthday. I can’t believe they are three already. It’s a cliche, but kids really do grow too fast! I still call these two babies, which is wishful thinking. They are so smart & funny & full of love. It is an honour to be part of their lives. We had a classic children’s party; balloons, cake & pass the parcel. It was a joy.

On the flip side my insomnia is in full force. Tossing & turning for hours every night is torture. I lie there exhausted, but feeling this horrendous unsettled sensation all over. The more I dwell on this physical embodiment of anxiety, the further away sleep gets. Every day feels like wading through mud. Surviving on minuscule amounts of sleep is the absolute worst.

When my body isn’t refusing to sleep, it’s passing out. Pots is kicking my arse. My latest fainting disaster resulted in two small fractures of my hand. The good news is that the bones are fast healing. The bad is that it is my walking stick hand and weight bearing is not easy. I’m feeling overwhelmed about how this is going to impact my mobility. Fingers crossed the predicted 3 weeks healing time is correct.

I might have to wear an ugly splint, but my nails look great.

Thankfully Bronan is always around for snuggles. A purring cat is a great stress reducer.

* Use my code Kerr50 for up to 80% off.

If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.

A week in the life…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

Last week was hectic. I packed in way more than was sensible. So, of course I’m entirely out of spoons now. It was worth it, though. I had some productive meetings and lovely time with people I care about.

First there was the little matter of tests and seeing some consultants. Unfortunately this involved pretty much an entire day in hospital, mostly waiting. Listen, I am very grateful for our NHS, I doubt I’d still be here without it. However, watching the impact of Tory cuts over the last decade is deeply frightening. Sickness, ageing accidents will touch all of our lives. We need a functioning NHS, it is a miraculous institution. Please keep that in mind when you are casting your votes.

T-Shirt – Primark Cardigan – Curve Soul Mask – Topple & Burn

Tuesday involved meetings about an exciting opportunity, which I feel good about. I long ago abandoned cosplaying as a suit. I feel fake & uncomfortable in that get up. I don’t present my best self that way. Thus, I turn up as me and I find that gets the best results.

Skirt – Gift

The following day was all Bronan. We went for his bloods & then a had bit of a wild goose chase for his insulin. Fridge malfunctions caused some problems, but we got there in the end. Bronan was very grumpy about his extended time in his carrier, but once home he got thoroughly pampered.

By Thursday it was time for a reward. I put on a pretty dress and had a catch up with my very favourite man. We went to Brutti Compadres. I love it there because the have the best tapas and Rosè sangria. Plus amazing lighting that makes it feel like you’re bathed in sun. It was so nice to forget about the miserable Scottish winter. Even nicer to bask in the company of someone delightful.

Dress – Forever 21 Shrug – H&M Tights – Snag

I finished the week in the best way possible; surrounded by niblings. I spent the day playing with Batman and baby bunnies, looking up cheeky animals on my phone and finding out about the latest happenings at school. I also had a good gab with their Mamma. Friday done right.

Trousers – Glamour @ Asos Cardigan – Handmade

If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.

Watching the clothes…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

Would you like to see some things I have been wearing lately? Excellent because that’s exactly what this blog is about. It’s all everyday fashion. I spend a lot of time with little people and in Dr’s waiting rooms; so comfort is paramount.

That doesn’t mean I don’t want to look cool. The keys to my winter 23/24 looks are layering & my Air Cloudies. I didn’t really want these boots, but they might be the best thing I have ever bought. Waterproof, fleece lined and cushioned soles. They are actually like walking on clouds. Also, you can fling them in the washing machine. Spoonie friends, you need these.

Dress – Primark T-Shirt – Delicious Monster Tea Cardigan – Curve Soul*

On the layering front, I like wearing my summer dresses with extras. Stick some tights on, tie up a t shirt & top with a cardi. You’re ready to face the Scottish winter.

This t shirt was a Xmas gift from my sister. I felt a bit teary when I opened it because it highlights how well she knows me. If you don’t want Joni Mitchell lyrics on your chest, fear not they are custom.

T- Shirt – Delicious Monster Tea

I love little floppy mini skirts, but since I cannot gracefully sit or bend, they would definitely result in a lot of flashing. Hence, this skort is one of my fav pieces. All the cuteness of a wee a skirt, with shorts built in to save my blushes. Tights & fluffy cardi make this winter proof. When it comes to tights, it’s always snags. They fit, they don’t fall down & I don’t ladder them on the first wear.

Skort – Simply Be T-Shirt – Curated By Girls Cardigan – ASOS Curve Tights – Snag

I’m 100% an outfit repeater. I don’t really understand the point of not being. I buy clothes that I love and feel good in. Why wouldn’t I want to repeat that experience? Most weeks involve repeats. This one was no different. I swapped my cardigan for a jumper and was good to go again.

Jumper – Curve Soul* Boots – Air Cloudies

Finally, I have today’s look. I fell in love with this jumpsuit the minute I saw it. I adore the zip and contrast stitching. I bought two sizes and even the bigger feels a tiny bit short in the body. Definitely one to size up on. If you have a longer torso, it might not be a winner.

Jumpsuit – Simply Be Tote Bag – Banksy Exhibit

I slipped on another Xmas gift today. This one is from my bestie & sums me pretty well!

Badge – 2 Little Boys

* Gifted. Use Kerr25 for 25% off at Curve Soul.

When there’s something strange…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

A little later than usual, but tonight we embarked on our Halloween tradition. My sister & I have been taking the boy to GlasGlow every year since he was born. This years theme was Ghostbusters & we loved it.

Kelvingrove Park & the Botanics are pretty all year round, but with added light show they’re spectacular.

The boy flipped when he saw the stay soft mallow man & ghostbusters car, but he declared the scary pumpkins his favourite part. I was rather taken with the giant mirror ball and of course I enjoyed how flattering the wall of lights is.

This year was much easier for me as they had added way more places to sit as you walk around. They also have ‘glow passes’ that allowed disabled folk to skip queues/take shortcuts as needed. Plus they even had blue badge parking. Tip top job of making the event accessible.

My nephew likes us all to wear skeletons, so my new jumper was perfect. Worn over the comfiest playsuit with tights & cosy tartan coat.

Coat – ASOS Curve Jumper – Curve Soul Playsuit – Simply Be Tights – Snag

I suppose spooky season is now really over. Best kick my Xmas organising up a gear.

If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.

I’d rather be fat and happy…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

About a month ago I made a Tik Tok about wegovy & similar ‘weight loss’ jabs. I had seen a lot of people promoting them, giving advice on how to get them prescribed etc. These positive posts all had notable omissions. I wanted to address the missing information.

I am fully behind bodily autonomy & wouldn’t tell people what to do with their bodies. However, I think it is essential that we have all the information before making medical decisions. It’s impossible to consent to treatment if you aren’t informed of all the risks, side effects and so on.

The current information on medications of this type is that weight loss will be most significant in the first 6months. Loss will peak at 1year and regardless of how long you remain on the drug, you will start to regain after that point. Regaining any weight lost is not only a certainty, it will happen fast. In fact the data shows that the pattern of weight loss & gain is similar to other methods of intentional weight loss. You are likely to regain not only the weight lost, but a little extra on top too.

People who have these injections report many gastric symptoms. Extreme nausea, vomiting & diarrhoea sometimes for weeks or months at a time. For others those side effects never settle. Long term use increases the risk of gallbladder problems & pancreatitis. Both are very painful, the latter can be deadly if not promptly treated. It’s also important to note that these injections have not been licensed for more than 2yrs for use in non diabetics. They have also never been prescribed in such high doses. The truth is there are still many unknowns. What we do know for sure it that these medications have serious risks & promise only short term results.

So, why am I going over all this again? Today I got a notification of a comment on that video. Reading it broke my heart.

I understand that sentiment. I used to feel that way. I’d make jokes about smoking instead of eating; saying as long as I was a thin corpse I didn’t care. I know how painful it is to feel that way. What’s worse is I know that many of the professionals who swore an oath to ‘do no harm’ feel the same way. Fat phobia is so ingrained in the medical profession that Drs recommend harmful meds, diets & surgeries to fat patients. Rushed to market, poorly tested and even known to be ineffective interventions. It matters not, because they’d rather we be sick or even dead than fat.

We deserve better. We should be able to consult our Drs when needed without the dreaded weight loss chat. We are entitled to treatments & procedures without having to first agree to dangerous diets. We are as worthy of respect and compassion as any other patient. And, we can demand it.

There are so many amazing resources to help fat patients deal with medical weight stigma. Two of my favourite fat positive medical folks are Dr Asher Larmie & Dr Joshua Wolrich both have written extensively on the topic. I cannot recommend their work enough.

I also support the anti diet work of :

Gillian Wilson

Vinny Welsby

Fat Women of Colour

Dr Diana Gordon

I too am happy to help if I can. I’m not a medical health professional, but have learned many strategies for dealing with anti fat Drs. I’m always delighted to pass these on.

If Bronan’s belly is cute, so is yours.

If you enjoy my writing you can support me here or on Patreon .

You take the high road…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

This week I took a little trip. My sister treated me for my birthday to an unexpected activity. Yes, folks, I went camping.

Well, I say camping. We had a Kingsize bed, log burner & private bathroom. It’s as close to camping as I will ever get. My sis, her boy & I headed up north to Loch Tay for a couple of nights in a fancy little dome.

Loch Tay Highland Lodges

The setting was beautiful. We had a lot of fun around the camp fire, visited the local beauty spots & even conquered a castle.

Doune Castle

October in Scotland is pretty cold, layers were important. I still wanted to bring my own thing to the outdoors, I decided to give the trip a leopard theme.

Glasses – Where Light

Set off in my leopard print dungees with some added spooky details. Comfy, cosy & very cute.

Dungarees – ASOS Skeleton Top – Boohoo
Brooch – Poesy & Grenadine

Kept to the theme with this long sleeved, tiered dress. My trusty snag tights (also in leopard) & my fluffiest cardigan upped the warmth factor.

Dress – ASOS Cardigan – ASOS

I always love to have uninterrupted Auntie time. Bedtimes stories & sparklers are hard to beat, but inside jokes with my wee sis comes close.

If you enjoy my writing you can support me here or on Patreon

Release the bats…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

October is here, it’s officially Spooky Season. I love this time of year. I’m ready for all the cold, fresh days and listening to the rain at night. I’m also delighted to dive into Halloween fun.

Let’s start with some spooky nail art . I kicked off with bats because they’re cute, but sometimes a little scary. Perfect for the season.

Hands with Halloween themed manicured sparkly silver with purple bats.

I hadn’t planned to do a new design so quickly, but I chipped the hell out of my bats. Now we have creepy cats.

Nails with Halloween themed manicure. Orange with black cats & black with green spider webs.

I wonder what ghoulish creature might be next. If you have suggestions I’d love to hear them.

If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.

Cut + Run…

~ somethinginthewayshemoves

When one of the world’s most illusive artists decides to stage a retrospective in your city, you have to go. Banksy said they choose Glasgow because they were drawn to impromptu art often found in the city.

The Front of GoMA. Stone columns with triangular roof. With a Banksy banner hanging down one column.

A prime example being the cone permanently perched upon the Duke of Wellington right outside GoMA. For years Glasgow City Council tried to put a stop to the cone hat. In the end the removing & preventing was costing so much that they had to embrace the cone. The spirit of those folks who just kept climbing on up obviously appealed to Banksy as the cone appears in clever ways throughout the exhibit.

Duke of Wellington on a horse statue with a traffic cone on his head.

Background covered, let’s get down to the art. The show was even better than I hoped. Very clever staging and preventing the use of phones meant there were plenty of surprises. The art itself chimes with many of my takes on the world, so I obviously enjoyed the context. It was interesting to have look at the thoughts behind pieces I had seen before. Also very cool to see the evolution of the artist. As we all had to lock up our phones, the offer of free Polaroids was a nice touch. It’s a big tick from me.

Accessibility wise GoMA itself is good. The set up of the exhibition makes things a little trickier. The very beginning of the exhibit might feel a little tight for wheelchair users. There are also only two places you could sit throughout, which I found hard going. It’s worth calling in advance to ask for accommodations you need.

The graffiti wall as you leave the building is a fun thought. Very cool to let folk release their inner creativity.

Tickets & Info here.

If you like what I do you can support me here or on Patreon.