I think I have mentioned before that I have been cutting down on clothes buying. For starters I have way too many clothes. Also there are just huge ethical & environmental issues associated with the way we consume. Anyway, the result is that I have been paying more attention to what I already have & experimenting with those items.
Which brings me to my latest kick; layering sheers It started with rediscovering this amazing coffee coloured sheer dress. It is has been shamefully under worn. We a had a belated Father’s Day lunch last Sunday and I wanted to make an effort. I paired it with a rubenesque slip dress and felt exceptionally good wearing it.
Sheer Dress – Monki Print Dress – Pretty Little Thing
So good that I had to try it again. This time I dug out my black sheer dress. I slid a mustard sundress underneath and I was ready for Friday adventures. The polka dots on this dress make it extra adorable. Both are easy to wear, so I can look charming whilst feeling perfectly chill.
Sheer Dress – Monki Mustard Dress – Boohoo
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Today was a good day. I saw my favourite man, wore a new dress and enjoyed a little sunshine. I’ll take it.
We had tapas & sangria in one Glasgow’s hidden gems. Plus a big long catch up. Midweek win.
I might live in this dress for a while. It’s very light and comfy, perfect for this weather. It’s a big bonus that I feel super cute in it.
Dress – Boohoo Shawl – ASOS Belt – aahhh I can’t remember!
To be an itty bit fancy I added this gold belt. I have no idea what optical illusion this belt creates, but my waist is definitely not that small. Plus of course I wore Ivy Verdure to avoid the dreaded chub rub. I can’t recommend this stuff enough. It works. Apply in the morning & it lasts all day.
After lunch I had a little rest on a step and admired my city. I’ve hardly been in town since the beginning of covid and it is really nice to get requainted.
Revolver, Wilson St.
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About a week ago I had a telephone appointment with one of the Gps from my practice. I haven’t had much interaction with this Dr and it did not go well.
After a brief conversation about the symptoms concerning me, she suggested we start with some basic tests and swiftly moved on to checking my weight. I asked why she wanted my weight and explained if not medically necessary I did not want to be weighed. The Dr replied that she would like to calculate my BMI. I told the Dr that BMI wasn’t scientifically sound and I didn’t want to discuss it. I’m sure you can guess how the appointment went from there.
It was the usual gaslighting and time wasting. According to the GP she would be negligent if she did not assess my BMI. I reiterated my objections to her weight focused approach, all of which were dismissed. The appointment was taken up with this back & forth instead of actually discussing my actual problems. I have informed various practitioners at the surgery about my preferences with regards to being weighed, discussing weight loss etc. I have disclosed my history of disordered eating and how intentional weight loss is detrimental to my mental health. I’ve also discussed the harm caused to me by weight stigma, which includes near fatal misdiagnosis and long term health implications. All of these conversations should be recorded in my notes as per my request. Yet still, I find myself regularly having these interactions whilst trying to access medical care.
Given our in-depth conversation about why I wouldn’t be weighed without solid medical reason, I had hoped that might be the end of it. I was fairly surprised when I saw the nurse yesterday for bloods and she asked me to ‘hop on the scale’. I gave her my standard, I don’t do weighing unless medically necessary. The nurse then told me that the Dr had specifically noted that she must makes sure she weighs me. I was internally furious, but calmly explained to her that I had already told the Dr I wouldn’t be doing that. Luckily, she left at that.
I am chronically ill. I have lots of interactions with medical folk. I am flat out exhausted before we get to the fat phobia. I often don’t have the fight in me, but I’m forced into battle. There is no let up. If I don’t assert myself I will not get the care I need. I know from bitter experience just how dangerous that is. The problem remains that even when I do stand my ground, the medical profession is want to shove back. Either I am entirely ignored or I am labelled difficult. It’s endless and wearing.
The persistence of these attitudes feels like a war of attrition on the patient side. It’s draining. No matter how many times I make my wishes known, they are ignored. Coming to appointments armed with facts, evidence and clear description of how this weight stigma harms me, makes no difference. Today was a classic example of this. I wasted my time discussing very personal & traumatic experiences with a Dr in order to justify declining to be weighed. She simply set it all aside and took action that she knew would harm me. I shouldn’t have to justify not wanting to do things that are not necessary or helpful to my treatment in the first place. However, it is clear regardless of how much time & energy I invest in explaining why intentional weight loss talk is detrimental to me, medical professionals will not listen. The stress of always having to be prepared for a fight is immense.
I will of course take steps to address this latest event with my practice. I can only hope they take action to protect me. It won’t bring the discussion of my weight to a close. There will still be another specialist, nurse or hospital consultant who views me as first fat and second a person in need of medical care. Right now the knowledge of that is way too overwhelming.
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It’s the happiest of Fridays because I received one of my very favourite deliveries. It is new glasses day!
I was particularly excited for this arrival as it contained a lost love replacement. I lost my beautiful lounging leopard in a fainting disaster. I was genuinely upset to break them and even more gutted that I couldn’t find a replacement. Woe was me.
Farewell Leopard Friend
Today the mourning is over. There’s a new leopard friend on the block. Slightly different shape and with eyes that gleam. I give you the ‘Merle’.
Welcome home, darlings. We belong together. I purchased these (& my many others) from Where Light . I am forever extolling their virtues because they are the best. I have saved an absolute fortune on the coolest glasses. Since they do have everything & I thought I might as well have these glorious sunnies too.
Is it cos I’m cool?
Needless to say I am delighted with my new frames. If you would also like to snazz up your face you can grab a bargain with code: LHK30.*
I’ve had some good Auntie time this week. Since my non auntie time has been frustrating and energy sapping I did sneaky little outfit repurpose.
My littlest niblings turned two this week, which blows my mind. I still call them the babies, but these little rascals are just determined to keep growing fast! Their birthday party was gorgeous. Fab decorations, adorable little ones, loads of presents and even a special vegan cupcake for me.
The sun was actually shining, so I wore a very cute linen dress with my fav t shirt knotted on top. The dress has pockets, always a plus and perfect for all the things little ones want are constantly handing me. T shirt is a Christmas pressie from the birthday babes and their big sister. I adore it. I will check with their Mummy where they got it from because it fits so well. I often have to cut the necks in t shirts as I don’t like how they sit, but this one is perfect.
Dress – Primark T-Shirt- Gift
Miraculously my t shirt got through the party without a spill, sticky finger or having to be used as a hanky. Thus my spoon deprived self gave it another go for dinner with my big brother and his boys. I came bearing gifts from my recent trip ensuring my auntie score stays high. Since the sun was still shining we were able to eat outside by the restaurant’s play park. We had some good carry on and the boys were happy all round.
Dress – ASOS
This time I teamed the tee with a blue strapless dress. Love the hem and the fit in this one. I am always amazed by how well this jersey dress keeps its shape and holds in place. It is super soft and comfortable, but when it is on I feel completely secure that it’s staying on.
At dinner I finally discover cauliflower wings that weren’t too spicy hot for me. Even my vegan mocking bro agreed they were yum. Plus I caught sight of my reflection and my butt looked great. What more could I want?
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As promised I have returned to share my holiday adventures. In a slightly topsy turvy arrangement I’m going to start with our last day.
We spent our final day cruising around the northern coast of Majorca. It was bliss. First stop was Platja del Coll Baix; a beautiful beach hidden in secluded cove. Crystal clear waters, sun on my skin and glass of rosé in hand, just perfect.
Much to the delight of her boy, my Sister was extra adventurous and leaped into the sea from a height. I really wanted to get into that beautiful water, but unfortunately I didn’t think I would be able to climb back onto the boat. Luckily, watching from the top deck was pretty magical.
Snorkelling and leaping complete we lifted anchor and sailed off to investigate some caves. My pirate obsessed nephew was convinced there was pirate treasure hidden within. He was beside himself with excitement when our boat crept inside for a nosey.
We rounded the cliffs and sailed into nothing, but deep blue sea and a distant horizon. We had a little boat party followed by a snuggle as we coasted through the Med. We dropped anchor again to enjoy some lunch. With the cutest lighthouse in the foreground and waves lapping at the hull, I was in heaven.
Once back on dry land we had a delicious meal on the docks and finished the day watching the sun go down on the beach. It was the dreamiest day and I loved every second.
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I am going on holiday on Sunday and I am very excited. I’m off to a nice spa hotel in Alcudia with the intention of spending most of the week at the pool. I haven’t done a holiday like this in over a decade. I usually go for more of city break type trips, but I feel the need to chiiiiiillllll.
I’m currently in the process of packing, which I hate. I don’t know why it stresses me out so much. I know as long as I have passport, meds and my purse that anything else I forget is fixable. I still turn myself inside out with lists and double checking. It always feels like omitting or putting one wrong thing in the case will be a disaster. Hence why I start a week before departure.
All that said, this time there has been some positives too. I am finding so many cute summery items that I have neglected for too long. The down side is of course I cannot decide which cuties should come with.
So, I’m going to try a little insta/blog crossover and you can help me choose. You can find me here on Instagram. Pop over if you would like to help me decide which looks get case space.
Let’s start with maxi skirts. I have this gorgeous cotton striped skirt. Ruffles are really not my bag, but I could not resist this skirt. Unfortunately it hasn’t gotten as much wear as it deserves, perhaps it is owed a little Majorca time. Alternatively there is this super hippie dippie, swishy number. I love paisley print and I think this one would be great for the beach. Thoughts?
Striped Skirt – ASOS Paisley Print – Boohoo
Next category is strapless dresses. I like that these can go day or night, but are still very comfy. The leopard print is so old. I got it in forever 21 many years ago and it hasn’t been out the wardrobe in an age. It’s in competition with a simple blue hankie hem. I really like the way the blue fits, but leopard print is just more fun. Fit or Fun?
Leopard Print – Forever 21 Navy – ASOS
Last, but not least we have the sundresses. Obviously a holiday essential; I’ve already packed a few. These two are left vying for space. First up is another cotton stripey. I love the button detail and it has pockets! On the other hand my little ballerina esque dress is entirely lovely. Pockets or Twirls?
Ballet Skirt – Forever 21 Blue & White – Primark
I thank you for your input and I will be sure to share my adventures in Majorca.
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It’s been a busy week. I have had all the Auntie time and I love it. I spent fun time with all of my niblings. My oldest niece is on the other side of the world, so we had FaceTime. The others ran me ragged with carry on.
I combined two of my favourite things by taking the littles book shopping. They all found stories to their pleasing and gave me quite the round around (literally in some cases). I wore an old favourite all week. It’s so easy wear, I feel great in it and I really don’t care if you object to me wearing it four days in a row.
Jumpsuit – Simply Be
On the subject of books, this week I have two on the go. I usually whizz through books, but I have been extra exhausted and finding myself conking out after one chapter. Thus, I haven’t finished either yet. How To Kill Your Family by Bella Mackie is a cool concept. I am enjoying it, but there aspects of the writing style that irk me a little. Overall, I would still recommend it. My other current read is Rebel Bodies by Sarah Graham. I am crazy excited about this and not just because I feature in it. It is an amazing examination of the gender gap in healthcare. Obviously an area of interest for me, but also a topic that is hugely important for all.
The kids have kept me busy, but I managed a little #projectpostit. If I’m I’m not getting much writing done I can at least spread a smidge of inspiration. Of course there is always time for dancing in my pants.
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Valentine’s Day is my Dad’s birthday, so my plans weren’t remotely romantic. However, I haven’t been properly dressed in weeks and I wanted to look nice for a wee family lunch. After much wardrobe pondering, I plucked out some old favourites.
I haven’t worn this dress in ages, I loved the swish the petticoat added. I’m been very into the double velvet of late. I think I scrubbed up pretty well even if I had to stick with cushioned comfy shoes.
Dress – Pink Clove Belt – Boohoo Tights – Snag Glasses – Where Light Blazer – Monsoon
We took Dad out for lunch and then did a little toy shopping. I even managed to finagle a frozen Coke, which I haven’t had since Australia. I love it, the delicious icy goodness was my valentine.
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This week Sam Smith has hit the headlines for being sexy in a music video; a thing a million people have done before. Why the outrage? Simply because they don’t fit societal ‘norms’.
In the current climate they are an easy target. A non binary, queer, plus size person happily expressing themselves was bound to push right wing buttons. Their faux outrage is expected. Waging their culture war with no regard for the actual lives their damaging. It’s disgusting, but sadly, no surprise.
The really sickening part is the crappy takes from people I’d expect better from. The same folk who usually embrace expressions of sexuality, raunchy content & playing with gender roles have no problem shitting on Sam Smith.
The reason for the different reaction is simple; fat queer people aren’t allowed to be loudly accepting of themselves. If you don’t fit neatly into a traditionally beautiful box you’re supposed to be ashamed. No joyful self love. If you’re not fading into the background, you’re pushing an agenda.
What’s more Sam has committed the cardinal sin of telling the truth. They have been honest about how ill striving to be thin made them. Also, very clear about how right it feels to have their correct gender recognised. They’ve talked about the hate they have received for simply existing as their authentic self. No one is really worried about a pop star dancing in pasties. They’re furious that someone whose body & identity they don’t deem acceptable is living their best life.
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Something in the way she moves... 
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