Feelin’ good as hell…

Global warming has given us another insane heatwave. It’s hard to keep cool in this weather. If you are concerned about what others may say about any flesh you reveal, it’s even harder. So, I thought I’d cover some old ground just in case any new readers need some tips. Here’s my guide to getting comfortable with your body.

Look at yourself.

I think the first step is looking at yourself. Really look. Stop avoiding mirrors and rushing to get dressed after a showers. Get comfortable naked. And in your underwear. And different types of clothes. Touch yourself, not the way (well, that way if you want). When it comes to your body familiarity does not breed contempt. Getting to know your body leads to acceptance, which is the first step to self love. You’ll be surprised how quickly you learn to enjoy your jiggle.

Various images of body parts

Take pictures.

Photograph yourself every chance you get. Selfies, nights out, big events, pictures of your feet, anything. Get used to looking at yourself living your life. I used to duck out of pictures because I hated the way I looked in them. Forcing myself to be present in those pictures plus taking hundreds of myself is the only thing that let me see the truth. I didn’t like the things society had taught me not to like. I hated my rounder face, flabby arms & chunky calves because I thought I had to be something else to be worthy. Once I started appreciating those pictures for what they were; a record of living, I could enjoy them. The more I looked at images of myself and others the more I could see that everyone had those terrible unflattering shots where they look nothing like themselves. Everyone had those snaps that amplify their perceived flaw. Everyone has those pictures in which we miraculously look like a model version of ourselves. None of it matters. What matters is having the memory of that time & place. Capturing that moment of you living your life. Seeing myself living & loving in those pictures showed me that my body was absolutely good enough. Your body is just the vehicle that allows you experience the world. What you look like at any given time matters much less than what you’re feeling & seeing & loving.

Happy fat snap shots

Positive consumption.

Surround yourself with things that make you feel good. Change your reading, watching & following habits. Ditch investing in anything that is focused on diet culture & traditional beauty standards. Discovering the Body Positive blogging community changed my life. For the first time I was seeing fat people who liked themselves. People with bodies similar to mine proudly taking up space & looking amazing. When you submerse yourself in spaces that reject fat phobia you begin to feel differently about yourself. To begin with I was in awe of those plus bloggers. I thought I could never have their confidence or be so beautiful. As I learned more about bopo and started unlearning all I previously been taught about my body, I had a revelation. If these fat women I was admiring were stunning, sexy & elegant then I could be too. If I see beauty in other fat bodies then what I despise about myself is not my wobbly belly. Click unfollow on anything that makes you feel not good enough. Replace that stuff with content that embraces diversity and honours people who look like you.

Start doing

Make a list of all of the things you want to do but feel you can’t because you are fat. Not just wild ambitions, everything. Do you worry about eating crisps on the bus? Think you shouldn’t wear a short skirt or even shy away from getting on top with your lovers? Put it all on the list and then start doing them. Start living your life. Pick the easiest ones first. Trust me, your confidence will grow. There will always be someone who does not like you loving your fat self. There will sometimes be looks or comments. You will stop feeling crushed by them. When you realise how much you gain from accepting your body as it is and experiencing your life to the max, someone saying you’re fat no longer matters. Losing weight will not make you happier. All you problems shrink to fit into your smaller body. You can live now.Fat woman living

Stay tuned for my advice on avoiding all the discomforts summer can bestow on is chubs.

Take good inventory…

I’m not a resolutions type of girl, but early this year I did have a stern word with myself about some things I wanted to get done this year. Some I had been procrastinating over and others that just seemed like a good idea. It’s time to take inventory.

Top of my list was making decor changes at home. Unfortunately I haven’t achieved all I had hoped. Life just gets in the way. In great and shitty ways. I have two new amazing little ones in my life, trying to expand my freelancing and a tonne of health issues have kept me busy. I have not managed the complete overhaul that I had imagined. However, I have updated the accessories and added some very cool pieces, like this amazing portrait & some delicious succulents. I reorganised and made better use of my space with some clever storage solutions. I also killed two birds with one stone & ticked off another from my 2018 to do list by creating a fabulous picture wall. I said I wanted to make photo albums with some of the thousands of pics I’m constantly snapping. I still intend to do that, but putting my most special moments up in the living has contributed to a revamp & got those lovely images into the real world.

Picture wall

I noted that I wanted to work on this here blog. Mostly behind the scenes stuff that I don’t take to naturally. Even the seemingly simple tech stuff is often baffling to me. I have kept to my word and streamlined the overall look. Plus I’ve brushed up on some of the boring blogger businessy do dah too. Mostly though I’ve really focused on increasing my content output; hopefully to good effect.

My third task is a total fail. I vowed to teach the Toyboy to swim. As of our last dip, about a month ago, he is still struggling to master a stationary float. He’s a very bad pupil and I am probably a terrible teacher. In his favour, he does still have the cutest arse.

The Toyboy

The final chore I needed to get on top of was my washing basket. Maybe there are people out there who have no problem emptying that damn hamper, but I am certainly not one of them. I am just one person, but I man alive, do I produce a lot of washing. The TB’s habit of leaving his pants on my floor does not help. Anyway, I am proud to announce that I conquered the wash basket TWICE this year. Yup, you heard me it was completely empty twice. It’s not a perfect score, not I’m calling it a win!

Excuse me I have to go me awesome