Come rain or come shine…

Last Thursday our teachers were on strike (solidarity!), so the little ones had a bonus day off. We decided to make the most of it with a wee woodlands adventure.

Unfortunately the Scottish weather did not play ball. The outdoor portion of day was cut short due to a downpour. The little ones were undaunted & Auntie ly discovered she is cute in the rain. Win, win.

Glasses – Where Light

I opted for layers to combat the changeable weather. Starting with my incredible leopard dungarees, adding anything cosy & topping it all off with a waterproof. I think I achieved the correct balance between practical & crazy auntie.

Fat women with her hands on hips wearing leopard print dungarees and yellow cardi
Dungarees – ASOS Curve
Anorak – M&S

We rounded up the day watching the choppy sea from the cosy car & it was perfect.

Helensburgh

The Home Front…

I joined my local Facebook group during the refuse strikes because I never knew what I supposed to be doing with my bins. I had mostly forgotten about it until recently when I noticed that folk were using it to help those in need in our community. I was so impressed with how tirelessly some people work to make sure no one goes without essentials.

I hadn’t considered this way of helping out before, but it really is incredibly straightforward. You can donate clothes & items that you don’t use. Little gifts, toiletries etc that will make a huge different to families who are struggling this winter. I don’t necessarily believe in the ‘charity begins at home’ mantra, but I do hate to think of neighbours being in dire straits. We all know that this year it’s harder than ever to make ends meet, it’s good to know that we can take simple steps to help.

Please check out local community, facebook groups etc if you are having a clear out or can afford to pick up a few extras this Xmas season. There are undoubtedly families close by who’s Christmas would be greatly improved by these little acts of kindness.

Kid’s Out provide Xmas gifts for children in refuge. You can select & pay for a gift online.

Alternatively, you can’t make online donations to a the following groups.

The Trussel Trust is the UK’s largest foodbank group. You can donate online to support their work of keeping people fed this winter.

Refuge have an option to buy a Xmas dinner parcel for a family of various sizes. You can help provide a happier festive period for families feeling domestic violence.

Indie Xmas 2.0…

If you’re still on the look out for original gifts read on. I have more glorious independent businesses & creators for you to explore.

Flamingosaurus Rex is a gorgeous gallery in Edinburgh. They showcases talented artists & always have the most covetable art. You can buy digital prints & funky stationary on their site or drop into the gallery if you’re local.

Topple and Burn make radical, left wing apparel & jewellery. I have so many pieces already and I will undoubtedly buy more. Their ‘Fuck the Tories’ Xmas jumper is an absolute dream. Topple & Burn practise what they preach by supporting excellent causes. You can’t go wrong with a purchase form here.

Juniper & Friends is an animal rescue & rehab. The women behind the store does incredible work with foxes, possums, skunks & more. She rehabilitates injured wildlife & gives a home to animal that cannot be released into the wild. I have been following all the amazing wee creatures in her life on Instagram forever. Watching these animals grow & thrive is wonderful. You can support this incredible work & get yourself some adorable items at the same time. Juniper & Friends have merch ranging from tees to art work created by the animals. These would make the perfect gift for any animal lover.

I will never stop singing the praises of Wilde Mode. Their pieces are size inclusive, gender free and zero waste. All staff are paid a living wage and materials are ethically sourced. They have the most diverse ad campaigns and of course their products are amazing. Their knickers are the comfiest I have ever worn. With an extending product range, there is something for everyone. Go shop!

Finally we have Fugly Plates , recycling old crockery into sweary works of art. I love eveything they do. Re using old things that no one wants is always a good thing. Even better when the final product is so cool. If you have a foul mouthed friend this the place to shop.

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Friday Quickie…

I am by no means a beauty expert. In fact, I doubt I would even qualify as a novice. I’ve never been able to keep up with the big thing in beauty. Nor have I ever had the patience for 12 step bedtime routines. I’m a basic beauty bitch.

It’s mostly cleaning, moisturising & spf in this house. Throw in the a face mask whenever the mood or a break out demands it and you have my whole regime. At 42 I’m beginning to think about the old face a little more. I’m wearing pretty well so far (luck & good genes). I am however a tint bit obsessed with my pores & would like to keep it fresh as long as I can. So, I thought I’d share a few things I have rated & one I didn’t like so much.

Right off the bat I’m a dupe girl. I’m down for all the befits at a fraction of the price. I have also found that supermarket/high street brands are more likely to be cruelty free too. Which, begs the question, if they can do it, why can’t he big boys?

I’ve been using the Lacura Rose Toner from Aldi for a really long time. I love the scent and it makes my skin feel super soft. The Healthy Glow is a new buy, I like it for when those pesky pores are acting up. Both are of course pixie dupes. I used to use the pixie toner and I honestly find these to be the exact same. I like easy and whapping this on with some cotton wool as just that.

Two bottles of Lacura toner

Talking about those pores, am I only person who is addicted to those little blackhead extracting tools? Well, in a effort to reduce my time at the magnifying mirror I bought The Ordinary Salycilic Acid 2%. It gets rave reviews everywhere, but I couldn’t get along with it. I have an aversion to anything that feels oily or greasy & this is oil city. I gave up after a few uses, I just couldn’t stand how it feels. I can’t speak to its efficacy because I didn’t give it time to work. It’s not for me.

The ordinary salicylic acid

In the ordinary’s place I picked up Primark’s Salicylic Booster Serum. This one I like. The serum feels much nicer in my skin. I use it every other day and I am already noticing an improvement after 3ish weeks.

My skin always gets dry at this time of year, I think because the weather is harsher. Anyway, it seemed like a good time to try out a new moisturiser. When I saw this Drunk Elephant dupe in the magical middle aisle, I grabbed it. I haven’t used the original, so can’t compare. I am enjoying the Lacura version, though. Super hydrating and soothing. I know nothing about all the varied ingredients and claims. Only that it takes care of the wee dry patches & it feels gorgeous on my face.

Last up is L’Occitane Body Ice Gel. It was a gift from my Mum that is definitely going to become a staple. It’s mint & verbena which are two of my fav scents. It has the most amazing cooling & refreshing sensation when applied. I use it on my hands constantly. At the end of a busy day it also feels so good on my feet. Apparently it is also a fantastic after sun if you bung it in the fridge. I’m sure my ghostly skin will appreciate that next summer.

Small Xmas 2022…

We all know by now that it’s good to shop small. Buying from small business allows you buy products that meet your ethical standards whilst also supporting your local community. This year more than ever those businesses need your support. Thus, I give you the first instalment of Xmas gift guide.

I came across Graceful Favours via a friend’s post on social media & I’m sold. They make pretty wedding favours and do some special chrismassy treats. The paint your Xmas cookies are just so cute. I know my little ones would enjoy this as a wee festive craft. Truth to be told, I would too.

Festively iced biscuits

Ebony and Black make the most incredible scented candles & melts. The inspiration for their fragrances comes from historical figures, places and moments, which I think is an excellent idea. For instance their Reign range, influenced by Mary Stuart’s return to Scotland has a beautiful fresh scent. I have this one burning as I type; my whole whole house smells like windswept seaside meadow. Everything is vegan and handmade in Scotland. Such care is taken over all the little details, these make a gorgeous gift.

Burning candle and wax melting

If you’re looking for something a little more personal Ruby etc is offfering original pet portraits (hurry spots are selling out fast). Ruby etc creates witty & unique art. I’m a long time fan, their work immediately ups the cool factor of any room.

If you follow me at all you can’t have failed to notice that I adore Pockets and Sedition. Handmade, size inclusive with pockets! They also donate a percentage of profits to very worthy causes. If you’re into all of that I imagine you will share my excitement at the launch of their Xmas range. Pyjamas & clothes in joyous Xmas prints plus some glam dresses for all those nights out. I bloody love some festive jammies for all that Xmas slouching, another must have.

Pyjamas with festive dinosaur print

Last, but not least we have Glad Rags, my favourite thrift shop. If you’re in the Glasgow area I cannot recommend this south side gem highly enough. Their stock is varied & wonderful, profits are redirected into the community and they support many local creators. Glad Rags also run lots of fun workshops & activities. They are not unique, second hand shops exist everywhere and are a vital part in reducing the volume of waste we produce. They are also an excellent alternative/antidote to fast fashion.

The easiest entry in my present list is already taken care of. All Bronan wants are unlimited paper bags and all of my attention.

Black and white cat in a paper bag

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In the name of the Father, the Skeptic & Son…

I was raised Roman Catholic. I went to mass every Sunday, made confessions, took communion. I attended catholic schools. My primary school was flanked by a chapel, a missionary monastery & a convent. By virtue of attending those schools most of my friends were also catholic. We all prayed before lunchtime, sang hymns in assembly and had regular R.E. Classes. What I mean is I understand how organised religion works. I was immersed in dogma throughout my childhood.

That’s not to say I always liked it. Even early on I remember having the distinct feeling that some it was icky. I didn’t like the bullying ways of my school chaplains. Some of the things my teachers hammered home did not fit with the whole peace & love vibe. Mass was never anything other than a thing to be endured. Catholicism always felt too rigid.

It wasn’t until I hit secondary school that I really started to call bullshit. I didn’t believe much of what I was being taught. More importantly I hated the intolerance. Catholic views on sex, sexuality, gender roles, abortion and so much more simply did not align with my own. Neither did they fit with what I had learned at home. I couldn’t bite my tongue in the face of bigotry dressed up as god’s word. Nor could I bring myself to do the cherry picking that many religious folks do. The catholic faith felt like a straight jacket & I would not be restrained.

Thus, I drifted away. I stopped going to mass. I let myself question everything I had absorbed. I dug into the history of the church and its current practices. The more informed I became the less respect I had for any of it. It’s all steeped in atrocities & injustice. Organised religion it seemed was just a way to control the masses. What better way to impose your will than to tell people it was in fact, god’s will. By the time I finished school I no longer considered or described myself catholic at all. I had & have no use for any organised religion. I believe there is a higher power of some description, but not some patriarchal judge in the sky.

Most of my family still belong to the church. I have friends of various faiths & none. I’m very much a live & let live type of person. As long as no one is trying to impose their beliefs upon me or actively do harm in the name of religion; I don’t consider it my business. I do however retain a distrust & distaste for the institutions. I want no part of it.

I tell you all this in order for you to understand how I felt when I received this comment on something I wrote on the anniversary of my baby’s due date.

Anger was my main reaction. I removed the comment & blocked the (blank) account. I hated the thought of someone more vulnerable than myself receiving such a comment. I felt angry that this so called church elder was trawling for people they thought they could manipulate. However, I didn’t want to give it anymore time or energy. They were blocked; end of story.

Unfortunately not. A couple of weeks later, on my birthday, I received an email. This time from a church elder named Liam McIntosh. It was more of the same. Insulting & ignorant comments about my life, offers of ‘support’ and that suspicious claim of referral from a concerned friend. There is not a single person in my life who if concerned would ask the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints to help me. This contact enraged me. I have an excellent support system, a sense of purpose and lots of joy in my life. However, I am aware that many people do not. I remember how little it took to overwhelm me when I was in the depths of mental illness & grief. I am also cognisant of how easily some people who feel desperate may be manipulated. Both messages utilised abuse tactics; belittle, claim to be doing so for the victim’s benefit and then purport to have all the answers. A church setting out to prey on vulnerable people in this manner sickens me.

This kind of behaviour is exactly why I do not like organised religion. It is predatory. This organisation is clearly seeking out people they believe to be vulnerable in order to manipulate them. I am not that person. I share my experiences in order to dispel stigma. I find the ‘concerned friend’ tactic particularly disturbing as it purposely exploits the guilt & shame that many people in difficult circumstances already feel.

After receiving that email I felt sufficiently angry & concerned to act. I tried to track down both men who contacted me. I could find no trace of either on official church websites etc nor could I find any record of professional training that would qualify them to offer such advice. The only COFLDS that I could find in Hamilton has disbanded. I called Edinburgh & Glasgow branches, but neither wanted to comment. Nor would they provide details of anyone in a senior role to discuss these communications. Some elders though are obviously reading this blog, perhaps they would like explain themselves?

I’m not finished with this. I am worried about the harm these unethical strategies could cause. As a result I am working on a more in depth piece for publication. If you or someone you know has been contacted in this way, I would like to hear from you.

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My week in spooky season pictures…

It’s the October week holidays here. Of course that means some fun adventures & more spooky nails. It’s getting chilly out there, so I’ve been getting into the cosy looks.

I went a bit horror on the nails and tried out some chuckyish stitched wounds. I didn’t want them to be too gruesome, so nothing realistic here.

Pale white hands with stitched wound design manicure

On Wednesday we decided to introduce my nephew to a place my sis & I have loved since childhood. The Burrell Collection is an art gallery/museum in Glasgow that has recently reopened after a refurb and shake up of exhibits. The exhibits are presented in the most incredible building surrounded by woodlands, but in the middle of the city. It is one of my very favourite places and it was wonderful to see the boy enjoy it too.

Long white corridor leading to huge window looking out to forest

The revamp is great. They have maintained the heart of the collection whilst adding excellent interactive aspects. The boy loved playing the games & puzzles, all of which helped him better understand the exhibits. The cafe has a great vegan & child friendly menu. The Burrell also ticks the accessibility box. Lots of space to manoeuvre, lifts to all exhibits, loads of places to sit down when you need to rest.

White woman and child playing an interactive game
The Burrell Collection interior
The Burrell Collection interiors

After The Burrell we checked out the also revamped swing park. Thus I needed to be both cosy and waterproof. I opted for this lovely jumper dress & light weight rain jacket; both presents from my Mum.

Fat white women with hands on her hips wearing blue jumper dress& khaki rain mac
Dress – In The Style
Rain Max – Marks & Spencer
Tights – Pretty Polly
Glasses – Where Light

I chipped my Chucky nails, necessitating a premature change. I went for some creepy trees and sparkly bats. Let’s hope I can manage not to wreck this design right away.

My nephew has recently developed a love for golf; crazy golf in particular. Today we indulged that new found passion with a trip to Paradise Golf. He loved it, claiming two hole in ones & ultimately the game. Auntie ly struggled a little, but luckily I had my perfect little man to play for me when I needed a sit down.

Child playing crazy golf

We had a little sushi for lunch, picked up some shark wellies & grabbed a doughnut before heading home. It’s always too hot at Xscape and I kept that in mind when choosing my outfit. I wore a bunch of old favs today including my comfy shoes & a skirt with pockets!

Fat white woman with hands on her hips wearing swing skirt and t shirt
T-Shirt – Curated By Girls
Skirt – Lindy Bop
Tights – Snag
Pillow Slides – Primark

A very big house in the country…

It was my birthday last week. I have reached the enormous age of 42 and it was a chill affair. I spent the actual day with my wonderful bestie and her little monkeys. Then at the weekend I was whisked off for a lovely surprise. I was instructed to pack a bag and bring a swimsuit. No further information was forthcoming.

We set off early on rainy Saturday morning and four ish hours later we arrived at Thainstone House. The sun was shining up north and our destination was perfect. A beautiful country house hotel set in gorgeous grounds. Complete with swimming pool & spa; I was in heaven.

Country house hotel covered in Ivy
Thainstone House

My Mum & Sister were behind the treat. Of course my nephew was along for the ride. We had a weekend of fine dining, swimming and carry on in luxury setting. It was a gorgeous birthday present.

Is it a hotel stay without a pic in my pants?

After dinner and late swim on Saturday we introduced the boy to Monopoly. He had been dying to try it and it turns out he is a shark. He showed no mercy as he bought up streets and flung hotels on them. His absolute glee every time I landed in jail was hilarious.

On our way home we stopped in Inverurie for a little shopping and outfit photos. The boy managed to leave with a monster truck & Gran stocked up on enough expensive scarfs to last a good few winters. All in all a successful weekend.

Not bad for an old bird.

Top 5 Breakups…

Whilst drowning a light weight case of the Sundays with 90s films. I dived into the top 5 originator; High Fidelity and I felt like doing my own countdown.

Before I get to that, I must say how fucking awful Rob is. I loved the book & subsequent film back then. Now I want to punch the lead & Nick Hornby square in the face. Whiny man baby, how did I ever find this character sympathetic?

Back to the top 5; no nitty gritty. Just broad strokes with humour. Let the countdown begin. 

5: The Chaser

Yup that old clichè. Friend of a friend I met on a night out. Pestered folk for my number. Just happened to be there every time I went out. He was cute and quite funny, but I wasn’t all that interested. Of course we all know where booze & proximity leads when you’re attractive young things. Skip forward a few meanginless fumbles and this prick has the gall to call for a big ‘I’m not looking for anything serious’ chat. Imagine having the arrogance to think you need to break up with someone you aren’t even going out with. I do not miss 22yr old men.

4: The Flying Dutch Man 

He was Dutch. He was handsome. Spoke 5 languages & said romantic things in all of them. He had a job that involved a lot of travel and I’d join him in cool places at weekends. We had a blissful 6ish months and then that fancy job required a move to Stockholm. I really didn’t want to move to Sweden and off he flew. That one smarted. 

3: The Accidental Rejection 

On our first date I really liked him, but didn’t find him even a tiny bit attractive. We were friends for a few weeks and every time we spoke I got more into him. He was so smart and thoughtful. He’d save bits from Private Eye or London Literary Review that he thought would interest me. He did my dishes and saved the kitchen herbs. That shit is sexy. He stayed over every weekend. Just when I should have been making things ‘official’ I was taking fright. He definitely could have been something. But you snooze you lose, while I was having a wobble he thought I was trying to let him down gently. Hence, the accidental rejection.

2:  The One I Said No To

He was a professor at my Uni and  I met him in the smokers room (that should give you a clue as to just how long ago this was). He didn’t teach in my faculty, so it wasn’t dodgy. He was a genuinely lovely man with a sculpted jaw. He wrote academic books, was an amazing Dad to his littles & he treated me perfectly right. He would probably have given me all the things I wanted. Alas, the one who came before totally wrecked me. When he popped the question; I said no. 

1: The One I Said Yes To

A deeply selfish little man who bulldozed my life. Obviously that’s the one to say yes to. Lessons learnt. Thank God we never made it down the aisle.

Up in my air balloon…

I’m still not getting out much, but I did wear two cute outfits & have a little fun this week. I used my auntie time to try out some new thrift finds. I’m quite pleased with the results.

First up was some time with my littlest niblings. The babas are walking now and so much fun. I tried my new twirly skirt and it was perfect for sitting on the floor and wrangling babies. Getting back up was a bit of a challenge, but hey ho.

Skirt – Thrifted
Vest – Primark
Shawl – Gift

On Saturday I had my first big day out in quite a while. We headed to The Hot Air Balloon festival in my Mum’s village. It was wonderful. I have always wanted to go up in a hot air balloon, but watching them take off was a close second best. My nephew was crazy excited watching them launch. He also had a lot of fun on various rides & bouncy castles. He even managed to convince his Mummy to let him have green hair. For this outing I wore another of my 2nd hand finds; an amazing cat print skirt. I went full crazy auntie & teamed it with a petticoat and nirvana vest. Then finished the whole look with a deeply hippie dippie shawl. I got some looks, but I loved it!

Vest – Very Old
Skirt – Thrifted
Petticoat – Lindy Bop
Shawl – Gift

Today I am in recovery mode. I expect it’ll be jammies for the foreseeable. Bronan approves.